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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Number of greeting kisses raised from 3 to 33

March 21, 2022

Luxembourg number of kisses

In an effort to reinforce a key Luxembourgish social custom, the government has announced that effective immediately, the official number of greeting kisses will be raised to 33.  For decades, the number of typical greeting kisses stood at three. However, this was reduced to zero in early 2020 as kisses were replaced by first-bumps, monk-like […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Leisure and Lifestyle

He went for a handshake, she went for a first bump, this happened, now she’s pregnant and he’s divorced

February 15, 2022

Fist bump disaster

Two colleagues have found their lives turned upside down after a clumsy introduction led to the woman getting pregnant and the man getting divorced from his wife of seven years. Michel Douby, 36, had just arrived at work one morning when he was introduced to Salome Funk, 22, who was starting her first day of […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Workplace

Luxembourg parliament accidentally votes in favor of vaccine ‘man dates’

January 25, 2022

Vaccine man dates

Luxembourg’s parliament on Tuesday voted nearly unanimously in favor of vaccine “man dates,” a typo that is now law and unfortunately cannot be undone. “I don’t know what man dates are exactly, but I’ve seen enough Hollywood comedies to make a guess,” said one deputy from the CSV. “It’s when a couple of dudes go […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Politics and Government

Positive test results no longer merit sympathy, man learns

January 19, 2022

Luxembourg man Covid positive

A Luxembourg man who recently tested positive for Covid-19 has been forced to come to terms with the fact that such a revelation is now of little consequence to others and will earn him no sympathy. “Just got some really bad news from the lab,” the single 32-year-old posted on his various social media accounts […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article

Two years of hand sanitizer and it still tastes like crap

January 18, 2022

Taste of hand sanitizer

I’ll never forget when we first started hearing about the coronavirus back in early 2020, and we were advised to wear masks, avoid other people, and use hand sanitizer as much as we could.  As for masking and social distancing, that’s been easy. It’s nice not having to shave or brush my teeth, and as […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article

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The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!

The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!
Prices in Luxembourg City

New shop in center offers usual stuff but at ‘twice the price’ 

Cashier watching you enter PIN

Cashier turns away, attaches blindfold, puts bag over head while you enter PIN

Man thanks LinkedIn

No, please don’t: man thanks people who invite him to connect on LinkedIn

Drug dealer Luxembourgish

Well, it’s a start: Gare dealer offers drugs in Luxembourgish

St. Valentine beheaded

Ghost of beheaded St. Valentine wishes couple a romantic evening

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