Following several weeks of awful blue skies and dangerous levels of sunlight, lovely gray clouds and rain have returned to the Grand Duchy.
“Hooray,” said one jubilant resident of Luxembourg City, opening a bottle of crémant upon seeing his street blanketed by a sheet of water early in the morning. “Darling, children, wake up, I have a wonderful surprise for you.”
“Oh, my precious drizzle,” said a woman in Esch-sur-Alzette, rushing outside without an umbrella to allow the raindrops to run down her cheeks like tears of joy. “Oh, how I have missed you.”
“At long last, I am free,” said a man in Ettelbruck who had spent weeks hiding indoors out of fear of his skin and eyes being scorched by the powerful rays emanating from the massive ball of fire in the sky. “Finally, I can go to the supermarket to replenish my supply of toilet paper, which I have gone without for 10 long and itchy days.”
While the return of precipitation is indeed a cause for celebration that warrants a massive party, a parade, and maybe the declaration of a new national holiday, officials warn the public to not get too comfortable, because the scourge of blue skies and sunlight could return in as little as two to three months.