Calling it “a discovery that fundamentally transforms our understanding of how toy animals form adorable little monarchies,” biologists have uncovered the existence of a Grand Ducky. The bright yellow ducky was first spotted in the Alzette River in Luxembourg City by a group of teenagers who were out for a night in Clausen. Unwilling to […]
Charles told to go back in until June 23
Despite being overcome with joy, Princess Stéphanie and Prince Guillaume of Luxembourg have informed their newborn son Prince Charles that he’ll have to go back in and come out again in around six weeks. “We’ve got this thing called ‘the official birthday of the Grand Duke,’ which unfortunately doesn’t happen until June 23,” said Her Royal […]
Brits unimpressed by Grand Ducal Court misconduct
Following revelations that the Grand Ducal Court is a difficult employer and that Grand Duchess Maria Teresa can be rather demanding, British residents of Luxembourg say they are unimpressed. “These stories barely qualify as gossip, let alone scandal,” said Deborah Hood, originally from Middlesbrough. “Our Prince Andrew is skirting allegations he took pleasure trips to […]
Oops: Grand Duke realizes they forgot to give him last name
A routine visit from the national statistics agency STATEC to Berg Castle this week has left Luxembourg’s Grand Duke Henri embarrassed after the monarch realized that he doesn’t have a last name. “Just to verify, your first name is Grand, your middle name is Duke, and your family name is Henri?” the young interviewer asked […]
Luxembourg receives state visit from the Burger King
Amid the smell of fryer grease and promises to give free Whoppers to local peasants, Reginald I, King of Burg, arrived in Luxembourg on Monday for a two-day state visit. The Burger King was greeted by Grill Minister Jean Lorentz, who calls the visit “an honor” considering the two nations’ mutual love of grilled […]