It began as an inspiring story about a woman’s deep knowledge of theoretical physics and her struggle to buy a home in Luxembourg at a reasonable price, but it has turned into a nightmare for the woman’s friends. Gulnora Jamalova moved to Luxembourg five years ago to work for the Luxembourg Institute of Science and […]
Housing prices plummet from ‘freaking expensive’ to ‘super costly’
Experts have confirmed that during the last 12 months, home prices in Luxembourg have plummeted from levels that would have made your grandmother pass out to ones that only would have made her raise her fist in righteous indignation and shout, “my god, that’s a lot of money.” “Last year at this time, we were […]
Deposit kept tightly in landlord’s butt has turned into diamond
Opening up new possibilities for the global gem trade, a Luxembourg landlord has revealed that a rental deposit he kept tightly guarded between his buttocks has turned into a diamond. Pietro Calvadore originally placed the 5400-euro deposit into his rear in 2012 after tenants Leon and Deanna Greaves moved into a one-bedroom Merl flat he […]
Landlady wonders if she can keep deposit because tenant cleaned too well
A landlady who conducted a moving-out inspection on Tuesday and reluctantly conceded that the apartment was in excellent shape now wonders if she could keep the deposit because the tenant cleaned too well. “I was hoping there would be a few scuff marks in the hallway so I could say we’d need to repaint the […]
Polyamory only solution to housing crisis, ministry admits
Following predictions that housing prices will continue to rise despite a slowdown in the market, the government has admitted that the only solution to the crisis is a widespread and enthusiastic move toward polyamorous households. “Look, it’s not like we can force 85-year-old grannies to sell the 2.5 hectares that have been in their families […]
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