An obviously ill-informed man walked into a Luxembourg City bakery on Tuesday, looked the cashier straight in the eye, and, according to several witnesses, said, “Sprechen Sie Deutsch?” Obviously, the cashier responded with “non, désolée monsieur” while still making valiant efforts to understand the customer’s incoherent utterances. Before long, both parties agreed to communicate with […]
Woman comes back from holidays with refreshed, refocused hatred for job
A Luxembourg woman who was suffering from generalized dislike for her job before her summer vacation has returned from three relaxing weeks away with refreshed and refocused hatred. “Before I left, I was really suffering from discontent for my work,” said Gaelle Leckey. “But it was a feeling that was all over the place, and […]
Renter buys house and instantly approves of price madness
A man who for more than a decade decried the local housing market as both “an indisputable bubble” and “a monumental scam” instantaneously changed his tune when he signed on the purchase of a house. For years, Jorek Goresh and his wife Ludmilla half-heartedly looked for a home to buy near Luxembourg City, where they […]
Luxembourger refers to ‘the Ground’ and you think he means ‘the Grund’ but you dare not correct him, and BTW, when are you going to learn Luxembourgish?
A simple discussion about nightlife led to a cascade of emotions ranging from social discomfort to self-loathing on Wednesday when a friendly Luxembourger listed off a number of bars you should check out, including a favorite pub of his located in “the Ground.” As you have lived here for a few years, you assumed he […]
French boss throws a little English into presentation and people are like, mon dieu, he’s good
The French-speaking director of a mostly French-speaking company based in Bertrange has just blown the minds of his team by using several English expressions during an all-hands meeting. The show of linguistic force began on Thursday at 9:35 a.m. when Philippe Flavy, 45, announced that the company would be moving to a cloud computing service […]
This expat said Luxembourg has no good beer so his neighbors threw him in a pool of local craft beer and yes it’s delicious but he would kindly like to get out now because it’s been 4 hours and the point has been made
A 59-year-old expat has been forced to take back his remark that Luxembourg has no good beer – in the most enjoyable way possible. Junglinster resident Thomas Malloy, 59, who moved to Luxembourg three years ago, offhandedly said to several people at the annual neighborhood party that while he likes living in the country, “it […]