An expat has once again turned to his trusted Facebook group for advice, this time for tips on how to best perform abdominal thrusts on himself to dislodge food on which he was choking. “Hi dear friends,” he posted on Thursday at 12:43 p.m. “You have always been so helpful, and once again I need […]
Magical elixir? When this man drinks enough alcohol, he can converse with others
While it may seem that magic only really exists in the fictional worlds of Harry Potter and Dr. Strange, one Luxembourg expat has discovered an elixir that, when consumed, allows him to perform otherworldly feats. Andy Blewitt, 29, has discovered that whenever he drinks from goblets of distilled spirits like vodka, whiskey, and rum, he […]
Small country has big Coque
With an area of 2,586 square kilometers, the Grand Duchy of Luxembourg is somewhere between the Faroe Islands and the city of Hong Kong in terms of area. Despite this, the country harbors a fun little secret: it has an enormous Coque. The secret was revealed yet again on Friday morning when Sara Gilles, who […]
Immigrant turns into expat after going out for brunch
In what’s being called a miraculous transformation, an immigrant in Luxembourg has turned into an expat after going out for brunch. On Sunday around midday, Hakim Salib, 29, joined two companions for a meal at a trendy restaurant in Luxembourg City center. Commenting on the cool, funky decor and pleasant ambiance, Salib ordered several items […]
More drone footage needed to attract winged tourists to duchy, say officials
Tourism officials in Luxembourg say they will allocate more resources to creating videos with stunning drone footage of Luxembourg, which they insist is vital to attracting winged tourists. “The vast majority of tourists who come here, whether for leisure or business, are of the terrestrial variety,” says tourism and nation-branding consultant Hans Popper. “We’re talking […]
Oh, sweet child of innocence: expat oblivious to tremor after French person says ‘en français, S.V.P.’ to Luxembourger
An expat who speaks neither French nor Luxembourgish and has no awareness of the centuries-old linguistic tensions in the region remained peacefully oblivious on Tuesday morning after a French woman asked a middle-aged Luxembourgish shop assistant to speak French. The situation occurred at a boutique in Mersch when 59-year-old Chantal Arndt approached a customer and […]
Luxembourg grandmother breaks world record for non-stop staring at stranger
Unbeknownst to her, an elderly Luxembourg woman has broken the world record for uninterrupted staring at a stranger. The feat was performed last Wednesday in a doctor’s waiting room in Mersch when Pascale Beck, aged 76, spent 29 minutes and six seconds continuously looking at a young woman sitting across from her. The woman, aged […]
These VDL bus drivers didn’t wave when they passed each other, and people want to know why
Despite tens or even hundreds of years of tradition requiring them to do so, two Luxembourg City bus drivers failed to wave when they drove past each other. The near total collapse of social order occurred on Thursday morning in Howald when bus 28 drove past bus 29. The drivers made eye contact, but neither […]
Gare district put up for sale in middle of night
Luxembourg City’s Gare district, which has been the subject of intense political discussion due to rising delinquency and neglect in the area, has suddenly appeared for sale on Facebook’s Marketplace, report the app’s many users. The post was made on Wednesday at 2:33 a.m. by an unknown official. “Used neighborhood, 164 years old, lots of […]
How expats can get involved in the elections
Legislative elections, which occur every five years, are just a few days away. Even if most expats will not be voting, there are still ways to get involved. Here’s what you can do: Learn about the system Luxembourg’s electoral system is likely different from that in your home country, so it is a good idea […]
‘Luxembourg: wild, drunk, and half-naked’ say nation branders in radical departure
Explaining that it is time for a new strategy to make Luxembourg stand out as an attractive place to live and do business, the agency in charge of the country’s nation-branding efforts has adopted a new, more attention-grabbing slogan. Claude Knepper, head of the Luxembourg Branding Bureau, says that years of promoting the country’s stability, […]
Five hacks to get free tap water in Luxembourg restaurants
Despite years of petitions urging Luxembourg’s Chamber of Deputies to consider passing a law requiring restaurants to offer free tap water in addition to bottled water, the drive has gone nowhere. Still, customers who dislike the idea of spending five euros for what is essentially the same stuff that comes out of your bathroom water […]