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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

It happened to me: I farted loudly on the tram and no one cared

September 28, 2021

Luxembourg woman fart

It was one of those mornings when you wake up with the stomach grumbles, and your mind races to find the cause. That’s it. That spicy red sauce I slathered over the chicken had come back to haunt me. Either that or the bean soup. Or the raw sauerkraut. I told myself to ignore it, […]

Filed Under: Featured Article, Health, Transportation

Mosquito, caterpillar, mite agree to divide up last unbitten, unstung patch of skin

June 25, 2021

Bugs and spiders in Luxembourg

In what’s being called the Berlin Conference but for bugs, arachnids, and other critters, three superpowers in the world of skin irritation have forged a historic agreement on how to fairly divide a recently discovered clear patch of human epidermis. The clear patch of skin, a rare find during a period of mass skin irritation […]

Filed Under: Featured Article, Health, Science and Technology

Massive dihydrogen monoxide leak at Cattenom nuclear plant

May 4, 2021

Cattenom nuclear plant accident leak

A massive cloud of dihydrogen monoxide was observed leaking from the Cattenom nuclear power plant on Thursday morning, according to reports. Although dihydrogen monoxide is naturally occurring and can even be found in lakes and rivers, as little as a few liters can prove to be deadly. Historians believe the chemical compound caused the deaths […]

Filed Under: Featured Article, Greater Region of Luxembourg, Health

New gun capable of vaccinating 500 people per minute

January 4, 2021

Vaccination gun the vaccinator

Citing the need to reopen society as soon as possible before we all lose our minds, an engineer from Luxembourg has developed a vaccination gun capable of delivering 500 shots per minute.  “I read that it might take months to get most of Luxembourg vaccinated,” said Jean Wayne, creator of the Vaccinator 2400. “That’s not […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Health, Science and Technology

Couple turn into gelatinous blobs after 1 week with no gym

December 6, 2020

Week no gym

Unable to work out since their gym was ordered to close last week, a fitness-loving couple from Capellen have turned into blobs of untoned flesh. The two were discovered by their cleaning lady on Wednesday afternoon. At first, the woman mistook them for melted ice cream, but when she attempted to clean up the mess, […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Health, Leisure and Lifestyle

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