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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Luxembourg Wurst sold to German sausage maker 

April 1, 2021

Luxembourg Wurst sold to German sausage companyIn what’s being called a logical move, the satire and humor website the Luxembourg Wurst has been sold to a German sausage manufacturer. 

A spokesperson for Hamburg-based Wurst Prinz, Jürgen Thüringer, says the company had long been considering Luxembourg as a potential new market.

“From Wikipedia, we learned that Luxembourg has a veritable love affair with sausages, cured and fresh, smoked and pre-cooked,” he said. “We Germans are the masters of sausage, and we figured that Luxembourg wouldn’t be able to resist if we unleashed our many delicious würste upon the country.”

The company developed a new line called Luxemwürste which they planned to release in the Grand Duchy this summer. The range includes crémant-flavored organic duck sausages, vegetarian sausages made from beer and Gromperekichelchen, and cheap frankfurters that will be marketed as a luxury good and sold to wealthy expats. 

However, the company faced a giant obstacle when they learned that the domain wurst.lu was already registered and that the name Luxembourg Wurst was already trademarked.

Thüringer says executives struggled to understand why a Luxembourg-themed satire and humor website used the German spelling, wurst, instead of the Luxembourgish spelling, which is wurscht. 

“It’s probably the result of ignorance, laziness, or both,” Thüringer said. 

However, the issue was resolved when the creator of the Luxembourg Wurst quickly accepted an offer of 250 euros and a year’s supply of sausages in exchange for the URL and the name. 

“We’re looking forward to a successful future in your little duchy,” Thüringer said. “At the end of the day, consumers won’t really see the difference between our Luxembourg Wurst sausages and the old Luxembourg Wurst articles. Both are too long, rarely fully consumed, and full of fake ingredients.”

The creator of the Luxembourg Wurst says he’s delighted with the deal and had no idea the site was worth anything, adding he plans on using the money to upgrade his toilet and buy a new pair of socks. 

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