A country that had been in a sour mood since November must have been massively shagged over the weekend, sources have claimed.
According to colleagues, Luxembourg showed up to work on Monday morning grinning, smelling of passion, and humming the song “Walking on Sunshine.”
“Hey, moien, et geet!” Luxembourg said when it threw the office doors open. “I brought coffee and croissants for everyone.”
“Oh, and look at the new dance I invented,” it added, causing Germany to roll its eyes.
Belgium, which has been suffering from a terrible mood of its own, leaned over to grumpy France and said, “It looks like someone finally got some sex over the weekend.”
France replied with a pfft and said it didn’t even know what that is anymore.
Although Luxembourg has always steadfastly declined to talk about its private life, it now admits that sitting on a sunny restaurant terrace while another person serves you food and as many drinks as you want is actually “better than sex.”