Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Officials: seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors ‘imminent’

LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Officials have issued a warning about the seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors, predicting that this year’s bout will arrive as early as next week. “Don’t be fooled by the mild early autumn weather,” said Myriam Bravini, chief fashion virologist for the Grand Duchy’s Office of Urban Apparel. “The season of men […]

Mission to destroy parents during holidays ‘accomplished,’ say Luxembourg kids

A summer-long effort by children in the Grand Duchy to demolish their parents’ mental and emotional well-being was a success, according to the movement’s leader, seven-year-old Claire Kieffer. “Two months ago, many of you believed we couldn’t defeat our parents, that with their physical strength, years of experience, and superior intellects, we would be forced […]

Luxembourgish boss forces entire office to order fish at Schueberfouer dinner

GLACIS — A casual office dinner at the Schueberfouer on Wednesday turned into a display of tyrannical power as the Luxembourgish boss who organized the event compelled all 17 employees present to eat the traditional fried fish. “I’d like the veal cordon bleu,” said receptionist Agnes Molnar, 31, when the waitress arrived at the table. […]