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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Intruders break into Luxembourg home and force man to eat his kids’ Christmas chocolate

December 18, 2020

Intruders break into Luxembourg home and force man to eat his kids’ Christmas chocolateBERTRANGE — A man working from home was the victim of an unusual crime on Thursday when masked intruders entered the apartment and forced him to eat all of his kids’ Christmas chocolate, including every last item in their Advent calendars. 

After returning from school, the man’s horrified children, aged seven and nine, launched an investigation, scouring the apartment for clues, alternating between questioning and comforting their father. 

The gang of between “three to seven men” who were all of “average height” and “had no identifiable characteristics” committed the crime sometime during the day, the father claimed, but he couldn’t remember at what time.

When asked which language the intruders spoke, the father said he couldn’t remember, and he also couldn’t explain why the aluminum foil wrappers were all in the bin next to his desk instead of in the kitchen. 

Frustrated, the detectives halted the investigation until around 7 p.m., when their mother returned from work and was excitedly informed of the crime. 

After several minutes of being interrogated a second time, this time more severely, the father broke down and confessed that the story wasn’t exactly true. 

However, he stood by his claim that intruders did break in, although they didn’t force him to eat the chocolate, he says.

Instead, the criminals were going to steal the chocolate and give it to the rich, spoiled kids across the street, forcing the father to make a difficult decision. 

“I actually saved your chocolate,” the father tearfully said. “The thought of those little jerks eating it was too much to bear.”

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