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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Woman stands in vaccine line for 3 days before realizing it’s massive line for Louis Vuitton store

June 4, 2021

Louis Vuitton shop Luxembourg line lineA woman who joined what she thought was the long line for the vaccination center in Kirchberg and waited for three days has discovered it was actually the line to enter the Louis Vuitton store in the city center. 

“I took the tram out to Luxexpo and there were a bunch of people queuing up, so I joined them,” said Yolanda Lombargo. “Some of them had camping chairs, tents, and sleeping bags, so I knew I was facing a long wait.”

Several times during her three-day wait, Lombargo got hungry and ordered food from WeDely. She also made arrangements with others to hold her spot while she snuck into various offices on Avenue John F. Kennedy to use the toilet and take a quick nap. 

“By the time we got to what I thought was the Luxexpo entrance, I was surprised to find myself at the Louis Vuitton shop on the Grand-Rue,” she said. “Since I had missed my vaccine appointment anyway, I said what the hell, I might as well see what’s so special about their handbags.”

However, when she reached the front of the line after three dreadful days of standing, an employee of the luxury goods store gave her a hard look, and with a noise coming from his mouth that sounded like “poot, poot,” he turned her away.

“Which makes sense, because I hadn’t slept or changed clothes in three days, and I had bits of sushi I’d ordered stuck in my hair,” Lombargo said. “Still, it makes me really, really want to know what’s inside.”

As for why so many people brave long waits to get into the Louis Vuitton boutique, employees have confirmed there’s something very special in a glass case in the back of the shop.

“If you ever hope to get close to it, you’d better jump in the queue now,” said one employee. “I can’t tell you what it is, but it’s very beautiful and it glows, and if you touch it just right, it’ll sing French opera to you, and it’s so special that unless you possess enough class, fashion sense, and disposable income, you won’t even be able to see it.”

Sources indicate that by Friday morning, the line to get into the Louis Vuitton shop stretched all the way to Belgium, causing a major traffic jam as both curious and confused pedestrians flooded onto the A4 motorway all the way to Arlon.

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Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Shopping

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