Are you struck by a crippling mix of guilt and social discomfort when your cleaning lady arrives? Check out these six fun places where you can hide and forget that your home is a mess.
Since the advent of the horror movie, wardrobes and closets have been the most reliable place to hide when you’re in a hurry. Prepare the space by filling it with essentials like a flashlight, healthy snacks, and a power bank to charge your smartphone. Careful not to give your cleaning lady a fright if she hangs up some freshly ironed shirts.
As most of us remember from our childhoods, a large wicker basket makes a cozy place to go when you don’t want to be seen: opaque enough to conceal you, yet full of gaps that permit air to flow through. Put a blanket and pillow inside and relax anxiety-free while the cleaning lady generously washes last night’s dishes even though that task was never part of the agreement.
Unless you’ve requested otherwise, most cleaning ladies won’t have a reason to go into your garage. Set up a chair, a table, and even a coffee machine, and you’ll be able to hide with all the comforts of not hiding. In case you get spotted, rub some grease on your cheeks and pretend like you were fixing an imaginary motorcycle.
Children’s swimming pool
You might need to contort your body to fit under this overturned plastic item, but once you do, you’ll find it suitable for all your hiding needs. Best of all, if you do decide you need to move to another room before the cleaning lady departs, you can slowly creep around like a turtle and she’ll never notice you — or your shame at having left clothes on your bathroom floor two meters deep.
While it might seem inadvisable to hide in the open, few people except professional spies look up at the ceiling when they enter a room. All you need are some high-quality suction cups that you can pick up at Hornbach or Batiself, plus some straps to attach them to your hands and feet. The moment you hear your cleaning lady putting the key in the door, make like a scared cat and jump up to near total invisibility. Bonus: clinging to the ceiling for an hour or more is a great way to increase your core strength and tighten your abs.
Do you despise yourself when your cleaning lady heads from room to room, discovering one horror after another, but you’re too lazy to get up and hide from her? Here’s an easy solution. Invest in a cheap lampshade and when she shows up, put it over your head. That way you can just carry on reading or looking at your tablet and, especially if you already have an eclectic taste in decoration, she’ll just assume you’re a new piece of weird contemporary art.