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Knock A Shining Dog

A sign of summer: neighbors organize annual garden orgy

MAMER – Proof that summer has arrived and the good times are here, a group of neighbors have organized their annual garden orgy. 

The yearly event draws between 10 and 20 participants every July and is held to celebrate sunny days, warm temperatures, and quasi-public raucous group sex that is safe yet free from societal constraints. 

Neighbor Tomas Mazur, 58, who has not attended the event since 2022 when he suffered second-degree burns while thrusting under the hot sun for hours on end, says that nevertheless he is delighted to see it happen year after year.

“There are certain things that signal to me that the fun and freedom of summer have arrived,” Mazur said. “Schools closing, friends excitedly discussing their travel plans, a slowdown at work –.”

“And a totally nude Madame Gäissel, the usually quiet librarian who lives next to me, standing in front of a rose bush, holding a whip and barking orders at the retired couple Mr. and Mrs. Lambert, while the four 20-somethings who rent a flat up the street and other assembled naked neighbors wait in a queue to be told what to do.”

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