Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Compromise at last: Luxembourg smokers agree to stop exhaling in public

An agreement between the country’s most zealous smokers and its most vociferous anti-smokers was reached late Wednesday night, leading many to believe that hostility between the two camps will finally subside. The deal allows smokers to continue enjoying cigarettes pretty much anywhere in public—on the condition that they don’t exhale and find something else to […]

September is National Drinking Month in Luxembourg

A coalition of the Grand Duchy’s top drinkers have chosen September as the country’s new National Drinking Month. Home to several national beer brands, delicious, locally produced wine, cider, and crémant, and the lowest taxes on alcoholic beverages in Europe, Luxembourg is the perfect place to drink — and this month is the perfect time […]

Multicultural group freezes mid-hello because no one knows which greeting to use

BELVAL — What started out as a chance to have a drink and catch up after the holidays turned into an exhausting ordeal when a group of international students found themselves frozen by extreme uncertainty in the middle of greeting each other. Joshua Bartleby, 21, a North American who organized the meetup, says that within […]

Officials: seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors ‘imminent’

LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Officials have issued a warning about the seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors, predicting that this year’s bout will arrive as early as next week. “Don’t be fooled by the mild early autumn weather,” said Myriam Bravini, chief fashion virologist for the Grand Duchy’s Office of Urban Apparel. “The season of men […]

Mission to destroy parents during holidays ‘accomplished,’ say Luxembourg kids

A summer-long effort by children in the Grand Duchy to demolish their parents’ mental and emotional well-being was a success, according to the movement’s leader, seven-year-old Claire Kieffer. “Two months ago, many of you believed we couldn’t defeat our parents, that with their physical strength, years of experience, and superior intellects, we would be forced […]