A resident of Luxembourg City has announced that he can no longer stand the endless roadworks and traffic congestion that have turned his once enjoyable nine-minute commute into a 12-minute nightmare.
“It’s bullshit,” said Bartholomew Franzko, a 44-year-old law partner who lives in Cents and works in Kirchberg. “Driving to work used to be pleasant, and it gave me time to listen to a relaxing song or two before facing the stresses of the office.”
“Now it’s a seemingly endless 12-minute slog during which I have to stop for two, three, sometimes four red lights,” he said. “Dodging border people in their tiny Peugeots. Having to wait for 30 seconds just because some guy in an orange vest needs to back out a cement mixer.”
Franzko admits that while he is lucky enough to have a new Porsche Macan and a parking spot at his office, it doesn’t compensate for the damage the now long commute inflicts on his spiritual and mental wellbeing.
“I mean, what sort of life can you have spending 1/96 of your day in a luxury vehicle with heated leather seats,” he said, “just to get to a large private office where you work your ass off but only make forty percent of what the equity partners make?”
“It’s not worth it,” he said. “Sometimes I think I need a radical change, that I should do something crazy to really improve my quality of life.”
Franzko says his recurring dream is to sell his spacious four-bedroom house in Cents – and buy a marginally smaller house directly across from his office in Kirchberg.