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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Government giving out 5 golden tickets to choose whichever vaccine you want

While most people in Luxembourg have to take the vaccine offered to them, a lucky five residents will get to choose the one they want.

“Those who find a golden ticket hidden in an otherwise ordinary letter from the government will be able to pick the vaccine of their dreams,” said program director Gui Vonka. “Pfizer, Moderna, or that other one that people don’t seem to want but which, I’m willing to say with 99.9 percent certainty, is most probably quite perfectly safe.”

Tens of thousands of residents have rushed to request various official documents from the government in hopes of improving their chances of finding a golden ticket, but so far no winners have come forward. 

After being administered their chosen vaccine, the five winners will have the opportunity to face off against each other to own and run their vaccination center, Vonka says.

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