• Expats
  • Grand Duchy of Luxembourg
    • Real Estate
    • Transportation
    • Luxembourg City
    • Politics and Government
    • Education
    • Luxembourgish Customs
    • Luxembourg History
    • Royal Family of Luxembourg
    • Finance and Banking
    • Business
  • Languages
    • Luxembourgish
    • French
    • German
  • Workplace
  • Leisure and Lifestyle
    • Holidays and Events
      • Schueberfouer
      • Christmas Market
      • Bazar International
    • Dining and Nightlife
    • Shopping
    • Parenting
    • Health
    • Luxembourg Wurst Magazine
    • Interviews and Profiles
    • Opinion
      • Wise Expat Sage
  • Greater Region
    • Belgium

Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Luxembourg chooses unlucky bastard to pay for entire free transport plan

June 18, 2019

Unlucky man chosen to pay for Luxembourg free transportSaying “well, someone has to do it,” Luxembourg officials have announced they have finally decided on a source of funding for the plan to make all public transport in the country free by 2020: local unlucky bastard Pit Dommlinger.  

“At first we thought about raising taxes and using the revenue to pay for the plan, or siphon funds from other public projects, but someone pointed out that if everyone was paying for it, it wouldn’t really be free,” said Odette Counter, a spokesperson for the government.  

“So we asked the royal family for some cash, and they said no way, especially not since you stripped the Grand Duke of his veto powers back in 2008,” she continued.

“Then I thought of a guy I know, Pit, a real unlucky bastard, and he while probably wouldn’t like having to pay for public transport for everybody, he wouldn’t be all that surprised,” she added. “I popped the idea to the ministers and they said sure, why not.”

Sources confirm that the unlucky bastard has tried his hand at a variety of business ventures, all of which have failed mostly due to events beyond his control, such as when a tree crushed his food truck. It’s also been revealed that the unlucky bastard has been married and divorced several times, and that he’s currently paying alimony to three ex-wives, one of whom just bought a new Range Rover.

And just last week the unlucky bastard went out for a night of drinking with friends, yet all of them skipped out on the bill and left Dommlinger to pay the whole thing.

“Sure, it’s not nice to make one guy pay for the buses, trains, the tram and all that, but can you imagine if the rest of us had to fork over our hard-earned money to pay for it?” Counter said. “Then we’d all be unlucky bastards. A whole country of poor suckers who get stuck paying half a billion euros for something they might not even use.”

***

Originally published by RTL Today on June 13, 2019

Luxembourg Wurst t-shirts and hoodies on Amazon

Check out our archives of 900+ articles, enough to make your eyes bleed!

Filed Under: Featured Article, Politics and Government, Transportation

Luxembourg Wurst t-shirts and hoodies

Follow the Wurst

Follow the Wurst FacebookFollow the Wurst TwitterFollow the Wurst Instagram

The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!

The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!
Man thanks LinkedIn

No, please don’t: man thanks people who invite him to connect on LinkedIn

Drug dealer Luxembourgish

Well, it’s a start: Gare dealer offers drugs in Luxembourgish

St. Valentine beheaded

Ghost of beheaded St. Valentine wishes couple a romantic evening

Routine involves switching from tv to laptop, tablet to phone

Ease into sleep by switching from TV to laptop, tablet, then phone 

Mexican food in Europe

You can make any dish ‘Mexican’ with random sweet red sauce, confirm Europeans 

About the Luxembourg Wurst

Disclaimer

Contact Us

Luxembourg Wurst © 2025