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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Woman worried people will notice she’s aged 18 months in last 18 months

June 11, 2021

A Luxembourg woman who has not taken off her mask at work since the start of the pandemic early last year is now grappling with the fear that when she does remove it, her coworkers will see that she’s aged 18 months in the last 18 months. 

“Just look at my mouth,” said the 44-year-old who works for a communications agency. “Before, I only had three to four little wrinkles, but now I’ve got four to five.”

“Also, the skin around my cheeks,” she continued. “It looks saggier, as if it’s just been hanging there under the pull of Earth’s gravity for, like, 75 weeks.”

“And let’s not even talk about my chin and neck,” she added. “Oh my goodness, I honestly look a year-and-a-half older than when we first started hearing about Covid.”

After dozens of plexiglass barriers were installed in the office and the woman reluctantly took off her mask on Friday, she expressed her anxiety to a male colleague.

The man, who himself has aged 18 years in the last 18 months and enjoys drawing attention to his now grey, thinning hair, giant belly, and mottled complexion, emitted a sharp laugh and said, “Yeah, you do look older.”

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Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Workplace

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