An expat has once again turned to his trusted Facebook group for advice, this time for tips on how to best perform abdominal thrusts on himself to dislodge food on which he was choking. “Hi dear friends,” he posted on Thursday at 12:43 p.m. “You have always been so helpful, and once again I need […]
Magical elixir? When this man drinks enough alcohol, he can converse with others
While it may seem that magic only really exists in the fictional worlds of Harry Potter and Dr. Strange, one Luxembourg expat has discovered an elixir that, when consumed, allows him to perform otherworldly feats. Andy Blewitt, 29, has discovered that whenever he drinks from goblets of distilled spirits like vodka, whiskey, and rum, he […]
Immigrant turns into expat after going out for brunch
In what’s being called a miraculous transformation, an immigrant in Luxembourg has turned into an expat after going out for brunch. On Sunday around midday, Hakim Salib, 29, joined two companions for a meal at a trendy restaurant in Luxembourg City center. Commenting on the cool, funky decor and pleasant ambiance, Salib ordered several items […]
Oh, sweet child of innocence: expat oblivious to tremor after French person says ‘en français, S.V.P.’ to Luxembourger
An expat who speaks neither French nor Luxembourgish and has no awareness of the centuries-old linguistic tensions in the region remained peacefully oblivious on Tuesday morning after a French woman asked a middle-aged Luxembourgish shop assistant to speak French. The situation occurred at a boutique in Mersch when 59-year-old Chantal Arndt approached a customer and […]
No one should be allowed to say Luxembourg is boring unless they’ve spent at least 10 years being bored here
Another evening with some new expat acquaintances, another round of complaints about how dull Luxembourg is compared to Barcelona, Hong Kong, or a secret community of artists and ravers living under the surface of Saturn’s largest moon Titan – wherever these whiners live before they come here. I’m proud to say I’ve called Luxembourg home […]
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