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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Couple stop calling dog their ‘child’ due to 2-guest rule

December 16, 2020

Following the passage of the two-guests-maximum rule in November, a couple from Esch-sur-Alzette have finally stopped referring to their dog as their “child.” 

For years, Susana Carvalhosa and António Ferreira, both 32, claimed that Mimi was their human offspring, which at first garnered some “oohs” and “awws” but quickly began to annoy everybody.  

However, a few weeks ago they realized that by claiming the dog as a family member, they would not be able to visit their friends and families during the Christmas season.

Observers have welcomed the couple’s return to reality, but many express skepticism.

“They threw a graduation party when that dumb mutt finished doggie school,” said Carvalhosa’s sister, a mother of two human children. “It has its own bedroom with dog posters and everything.”

“They dress it in pajamas and brush its teeth before bed,” she continued. “How can they drop a delusion like that so easily?”

The change was inadvertently announced on Tuesday, when Carvalhosa asked a friend of she and Ferreira could visit for a couple hours to drop off a present and share a bottle of wine. 

“What about your kid?” said the friend in a mocking tone. “That makes three of you. Not allowed.”

“You mean Mimi, our dog?” Carvalhosa said. “Uh, she’ll be fine at home for a couple of hours.”

“We’ll set out a bowl of food and put on Netflix,” she added.

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