An entrepreneurial mugger who has seen his income explode over the past 12 months has created his own company. Donald “Don” Moiton-Collier, 22, relocated to Luxembourg City last winter after a friend here told him about the amazing opportunities in the field of the forceful removal of personal belongings. However, he says that success didn’t […]
Luxembourg family forced to consider using public transport
A Luxembourg City couple so reliant on their cars that they even drive to visit friends across the street say that due to the skyrocketing cost of petrol, they have decided to consider using public transport. Umberto and Carole Frintz made the decision on Friday during a late-night discussion after Carole calculated it would now […]
Oligarch uses opportunity to go back to school for master’s degree in oligarchy
A Russian oligarch who has found his overseas accounts frozen, his yacht seized, and his private jet without a place to land in Europe has decided to take the opportunity to get an advanced degree in oligarchy. “Some of my fellow Russian billionaires complain about the sanctions that target men like us, but I see […]
Luxembourgish woman ‘befriended hundreds of outsiders’
A Luxembourgish woman from Frendlechdange is under investigation for violating social norms after it was discovered she had befriended hundreds of outsiders. The woman, Lizzy Koncke, 41, stands accused of “approaching hundreds of people who were apparently new to Luxembourg, both in expat forums and in person, and offering to take them on free, informative […]
‘But you like Darth Vader,’ says an exasperated Putin
Russian president Vladimir Putin has expressed confusion as to why many now view him as a monumental dickhead, saying that as far as he knew, everyone always seemed to admire villains like Darth Vader, for instance. “Vader was a consummate homicidal maniac,” Putin said. “He strangled his subordinates from three meters away, blew up planets […]
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