A Luxembourg City mugger was greatly relieved to learn on Saturday that a group of police officers in an armored vehicle were speeding toward protestors near the Glacis who refused to disperse – and not him. “I was hanging out in the city center looking for a suitable victim for my next purse grab, when […]
Revealed: everyone a little hesitant to criticize government because everyone getting subsidies
In response to the question why there is not more public criticism of the the new Covid-19 law, the government’s hardline stance against protestors, and last weekend’s show of force that involved hundreds or even thousands of cops, many of them imported, and an actual water cannon, it has been revealed that everyone is getting […]
Hundreds of foreign cops in riot gear? A freakin’ water cannon? Here’s a photo of a kitten instead
Isn’t this kitten cute? He’s kind of like, “Oh, I can’t be bothered. What? Oh, food. Yeah, in a little bit, when I’ve finished my nap.” But seriously, as far as kittens go, this one is one of the cutest. If you belonged to us, we’d name you Sleepyhead. There’s nothing weird about hundreds of […]
Wife admits to having affair with Action
Amid tear-filled apologies, a Luxembourg wife has admitted that for the past 18 months she has been having an affair with Action. Husband Luca Incornoratscu says he discovered his wife’s clandestine relationship with the discount chain during an unannounced stop at home to pick up some papers he had forgotten. “I walked into our apartment […]
Drug dealer in front of building ‘an amenity,’ says Gare agent
LUXEMBOURG CITY – In a moment of inspiration, a real estate agent showing a unit in a new luxury apartment building in the Gare district has claimed the drug dealer downstairs as “an amenity.” “This unit has three bedrooms and two bathrooms, one of which is en suite,” said Antonio Lopes, giving a young couple […]
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