Proving that the country is keeping its eyes on the stars, Luxembourg has announced it has invested 50 million euros in a company that plans on mining a recently photographed black hole. “Some critics say we’re just throwing money into a giant hole, but that’s the point,” said Hubert Sternmann, spokesperson for the government’s Office […]
Know-it-all expat can name prime minister
CLAUSEN — In a move that’s unsurprising because he’s a total know-it-all, according to those close to him, a local expat has impressed his friends by giving the name of Luxembourg’s prime minister. Sasha Onyeze, 34, has over the years fostered a reputation as someone who reads too much about arcane topics, and who likes […]
Local fish demand ‘anatomically correct’ Melusina
LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Complaining that the mythical half-fish, half-woman Melusina is always represented as mostly woman, a group of local fish are demanding an end to depictions of her that aren’t “anatomically correct.” On Tuesday afternoon, at least 20 fish gathered on the banks of the Alzette in the Grund near a statue of Melusina where […]
Luxembourg police radar awarded for service
SCHOENFELS — A Luxembourg radar unit has been given the highest award in speed limit enforcement after having caught 100,000 careless drivers since it was dispatched nearly three years ago. On Tuesday afternoon during a lull in traffic, Captain Marco Trausch gave a Medal of Merit to Unit 12, which operates on CR101 between Kopstal […]
International comedy set in Luxembourg ‘impossible,’ say experts
Experts from the Luxembourg Academy of Entertainment Sciences have released a statement saying they are “perplexed” by the upcoming release of “Sawah,” an international comedy set in Luxembourg, which until recently they believed was a cinematic impossibility. “Ticket checkers on city buses, vegetarian sausages, funny movies in English set in Luxembourg,” said Dr. Maria Sonnenschein. […]
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