Saying the only way to release the pent-up stress in the country is by creating a national holiday during which all crimes and antisocial behavior are permitted, Luxembourg officials have announced a yearly “purge.” Called Luxem-Purge in honor of the movie franchise that popularized the concept of an annual night of lawlessness, the event will […]
Company holds meeting to choose best dull ‘Happy Year Year’ image for social media
Members of a communications department have held a meeting to decide which totally uninspired Happy New Year image they will share on the company social media accounts. “It’s been a tough year, for our shareholders, customers, and the other people who for some weird reason follow us on social media,” said communications manager Isadora Hendrez. […]
How to save money by telling your kids Santa failed CovidCheck
While it feels good to give your children expensive gifts that will become obsolete and boring in exactly 11 days, consider giving your finances a little break. Here’s how to get away with spending no money on Christmas presents for your kids while avoiding all blame. A few hours before gifts normally miraculously appear, express […]
Covid has sadly ruined our ability to find joy in simple overconsumption
Once upon a time, Christmas meant something. It was about being bombarded with advertisements for the “newest, coolest” stuff you neither needed nor wanted. It was about rushing out to buy that stuff and not having to worry that other shoppers might infect you. It was about giving in to immense seasonal pressure to blow […]
Newcomer pronounces ‘Gromperekichelcher’ correctly on first try
In what’s being compared to a young Arthur pulling the sword from the stone, a new arrival in the Grand Duchy has managed to pronounce Gromperekichelcher correctly on the first try. On Wednesday, just days after moving to Luxembourg, Zaqueu Belem, 30, was taken by two colleagues to the Christmas market. Upon seeing a food […]
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