Opening up new possibilities for the global gem trade, a Luxembourg landlord has revealed that a rental deposit he kept tightly guarded between his buttocks has turned into a diamond.  Pietro Calvadore originally placed the 5400-euro deposit into his rear in 2012 after tenants Leon and Deanna Greaves moved into a one-bedroom Merl flat he […]

A landlady who conducted a moving-out inspection on Tuesday and reluctantly conceded that the apartment was in excellent shape now wonders if she could keep the deposit because the tenant cleaned too well.  “I was hoping there would be a few scuff marks in the hallway so I could say we’d need to repaint the […]

Following predictions that housing prices will continue to rise despite a slowdown in the market, the government has admitted that the only solution to the crisis is a widespread and enthusiastic move toward polyamorous households. “Look, it’s not like we can force 85-year-old grannies to sell the 2.5 hectares that have been in their families […]

A man who for more than a decade decried the local housing market as both “an indisputable bubble” and “a monumental scam” instantaneously changed his tune when he signed on the purchase of a house.  For years, Jorek Goresh and his wife Ludmilla half-heartedly looked for a home to buy near Luxembourg City, where they […]