We all know the feeling: you drive to the supermarket for a jumbo jar of garlic-stuffed olives (yum!), and when you get back to your car, you see that someone has jammed a business card in your window. At first you’re angry because you assume the card is from that crazed financial advisor who’s been […]
Expats get new greeting which is ‘half-handshake, half-hug, and an air kiss on top’
After years of observing expats struggle to not only master the Grand Duchy’s various physical greetings but understand when they are appropriate, officials have developed a new one-size-fits-all greeting. Dubbed the Hugshake Kiss, it has been described as “a half-handshake and half-hug with an air kiss on top.” Officials say it is the same awkward, […]
Scary but true: man tries to order meal in middle of afternoon
A man believed to be a jet-lagged tourist, a new arrival from another continent, or an anarchist has attempted to order a meal at a restaurant in the middle of the afternoon. The attempt took place on Thursday from around 2:30 to 3:45 p.m. when the unidentified male visited as many as nine different restaurants […]
Outrage after woman bobs head to tram music
What started as a mundane journey on the Luxembourg City tram on Tuesday morning turned into an unpleasant spectacle that caused shock and outrage. As the Kirchberg-bound tram slowed to a halt at the Faïencerie stop, a short melody was played. Against all unwritten codes of tram etiquette, a passenger bounced her head from side […]
Hundreds attend vigil for Luxembourg man’s scarf
Hundreds of people attended a vigil on Tuesday night for a Luxembourg City man’s scarf that went missing last week. The scarf, a gray tasseled piece of wool that 40-year-old Antoine Kleptart bought in Brussels last December, was lost during a night out with friends in the city center on Friday. “Scarf, you have been […]
State conducts survey to see if residents like surveys
Following years of collecting statistics about how much money residents spend on food condiments per month and if they are satisfied with the way their neighbors take care of their gardens, the state has conducted a survey to see if residents like its surveys. “We wanted to get more insight into how residents feel about […]
Fear of contagion after American gives large tip to local waiter
An American resident of Luxembourg has given a nearly 25-percent tip for a simple lunch, prompting fears that the practice could spread. The incident occurred at a brasserie in Luxembourg City on Tuesday when Rachel White received a bill of €19.65 yet paid 25 euros. White explained that her meal, which consisted of a bottle […]
Man wishes wife would give him a little more recognition for all he’s done for her on International Women’s Day
A Luxembourg man has admitted to feeling underappreciated by his wife for all he has done for her on International Women’s Day. Eduardo Caudillo says that in recognition of his wife Sandra and women everywhere, he took over many of the morning tasks she normally does. These included waking up early to empty the dishwasher […]
Smug woman needs to remind everyone that rain is reason she can grow moss on her face
A woman described as a nature lover has been annoying coworkers and friends with her usual remark whenever anyone complains about the rain: it is only thanks to the rain that she is able to grow moss on her face. As it has been a particularly rainy past few weeks, when they arrive in the […]
Weird but true: this employee is motivated
A company in Kirchberg has reported that among its many normal, discontent staff members is one who is actually motivated to work. Because Omar Cortez has been with AGL Software for five years, experts say his motivation is not the result of being new on the job and that it is rooted in some deeper […]
‘I’m available for selfies,’ Frieden reminds public
In a recent press conference to address the topic, Prime Minister Luc Frieden has reminded the public that he is available, willing, and happy to take selfies with members of the public. “Just like my predecessor, I’m fun, spontaneous, and I know how to smile,” he said. “Like him, I’m very capable of walking around […]
Expat spends 30 minutes looking at wine only to settle on cheapest, vilest bottle
An expat who fancies himself as a man of culture and good taste has spent more than 30 minutes inspecting various bottles of wine at a Kirchberg supermarket wine fair before choosing one simply because it was the absolute cheapest. “It’s got a nice label, and I really like the color,” he said to himself […]