Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

‘Gilets jaunes’ blocking traffic in Luxembourg

After days of violent protests in France, demonstrators known as the “gilets jaunes,” named for the yellow safety vests they wear, have spilled over into Luxembourg. By Monday afternoon, the group had forced hundreds of motorists to slow down and stop. Reports indicate that the gilets jaunes have appeared in nearly every neighborhood in the […]

Juncker video confirms rumors that Earth is spinning wildly out of control

For years, conspiracy theorists have claimed that our planet’s rotational speed has been rapidly increasing, and yet while most people scoffed at the idea, new evidence suggests the conspiracy theorists might be right. On Wednesday, video footage was released of former Luxembourgish politician and current European Commission president Jean-Claude Juncker at a meeting with world […]

Opinion: Luxembourg would be cooler if the Grand Duke rode around on a big horse and abused peasants

Growing up on another continent, I always had a romantic image of European monarchs living in castles and hosting lavish banquets where lords and ladies drank wine, danced, and made the court jester wear a hog’s head and run around on all fours, snorting and bumping into things. I also imagined that in their free […]

Oops! Grand Duke loses Luxembourg in late-night poker game

MONTE CARLO — Shocking residents, officials, and royal observers alike, Luxembourg’s reigning monarch briefly lost the Grand Duchy to Spain on Wednesday night in a game of high-stakes poker. The game, played between His Royal Highness Grand Duke Henri, Spain’s King Felipe, Carl XVI Gustaf of Sweden, and several other monarchs, quickly went from being […]