Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

All of woman’s clothes with color fly south for winter

In adherence to the laws of nature, meteorology, and fashion, the entirety of a Luxembourg woman’s set of colorful apparel has begun its annual journey south. The departure occurred on Tuesday morning as post-Schueberfouer chilly drizzle and gray skies signaled the definite end of summer.  “Au revoir pink, goodbye turquoise, and äddi canary yellow,” whispered […]

Code red: non-native French speaker pronounces ‘u’ as ‘ou’ 

What started as a functional yet tense conversation between a customer and a supermarket employee on Friday ended in disaster after the customer pronounced the French “u” like “ou.” Karen Aradóttir, who regularly shops at the Dudelange supermarket, was looking for items for her son’s birthday party including candles, chocolate sprinkles, and lastly, a children’s […]

Caritas Luxembourg unveils new €60-million yacht named ‘Charity’

Finally answering the question “where the hell did all those sixty-plus millions of euros of embezzled money go?” a source for the now mostly defunct Caritas Luxembourg has presented the organization’s latest acquisition: a luxury yacht lovingly named Charity.   “You may wonder why we’d need a luxury yacht that’s docked safely away from EU […]

This expat was lightly shamed by a Luxembourger for not being able to speak Luxembourgish, so in his mind he shamed her for making an English grammar mistake 

An exchange in English with a Luxembourgish plum jam vendor ended with an expat delving into a pedagogic interior monologue about present tenses in English. The imaginary lesson was delivered after the expat accepted a sample from the vendor at a shopping center. After a brief exchange in English, the vendor said, “You have lived […]