WALFERDANGE — A fun afternoon at the swimming pool quickly turned into a nightmare for a local man after he was forced by staff to wear grape-hugging lycra briefs — known as “budgie smugglers” or by the brand name Speedos. On Sunday, the victim tried to enter the pool with loose-fitting swimming trunks, which are […]
Cashier who commutes 4 hours each day ‘should be friendlier’ insists expat
LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — A customer of a Luxembourg petrol station has declared that he is fed up with getting frigid treatment from a cashier simply because her life is a drudgery of long commutes, dull work, and minimum salary. “Nearly every time I stop there to fill up my Range Rover or pick up a bottle of […]
Embarrassing: this Bierger-Center employee only speaks six languages
LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — A native and resident of Kehlen who works as a civil servant in the capital has admitted to suffering from “deep feelings of inadequacy” and worries that he is “linguistically challenged” when in the presence of colleagues who speak more languages than him. Marco Pohlen, who works in the Bierger-Center, says that recently […]
Registering for INL course a Kafkaesque nightmare
Trying to sign up for a language course via the Institut National des Langues (INL) website is very similar to reading a story by Franz Kafka and then, when the story becomes too horrifying to bear and you close the book, you realize you cannot because you are now the ill-fated protagonist and there is […]
New express gym in Gasperich offering 5-minute workouts
If you want to get in shape but don’t want to spend a grueling 20 minutes in a cramped space next to a man who hasn’t showered in two weeks and drags his knuckles on the ground, you’re in luck. Luxembourg’s largest fitness chain is opening a new express walk-through gym in Gasperich. The open-air […]
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