A Russian oligarch who has found his overseas accounts frozen, his yacht seized, and his private jet without a place to land in Europe has decided to take the opportunity to get an advanced degree in oligarchy. “Some of my fellow Russian billionaires complain about the sanctions that target men like us, but I see […]

Russian president Vladimir Putin has expressed confusion as to why many now view him as a monumental dickhead, saying that as far as he knew, everyone always seemed to admire villains like Darth Vader, for instance. “Vader was a consummate homicidal maniac,” Putin said. “He strangled his subordinates from three meters away, blew up planets […]

A domestic abuser who insists that he is opposed to Russia’s attack on Ukraine also says that we should not have made Putin angry.  “We know that Vladimir Putin doesn’t want to hurt anyone unless someone gives him a good reason,” the domestic abuser said. “It’s the same way with me, in my house, like […]

Saying they have exhausted their coverage of all possible topics from Luxembourg, the Greater Region, Europe, and the rest of the world, a local newspaper has announced it will now turn its attention – and yours – to a minor celebrity story from the US. “That actress from California, you know the one, she was […]