Aware that the average user spends up to nine minutes every day posting “happy birthday” messages on friends’ timelines, Facebook has announced that it will allow users to automate this task. “By clicking on the new ‘automate birthday wishes’ button, users may opt for automatic birthday wishes for all friends from now until the platform […]
The end of times is near: Luxembourg server directly asks for tip
A Luxembourg City waiter is being called “a harbinger of doom” who is “not a trumpeter of the apocalypse, but something close, maybe his kid brother with a kazoo” after he explicitly requested a tip from a customer. The portentous act occurred at a restaurant in Howald during an otherwise normal Tuesday when the employee […]
Microstate, ministate – no asshole, Luxembourg is a humungo-state
Lately there have been some memes and online discussions, not all of them kind and some full of ridicule, about the size of Luxembourg, with people sharing images of Luxembourg compared to Andorra, Malta, the Vatican – even a Renault Twingo! Some assholes have the nerve to call Luxembourg a ministate, while others (who want […]
Woman can only orgasm by thinking about sales rack at German discount supermarket
WALFERDANGE – A local woman has confirmed that despite having otherwise vanilla sexual fantasies, she can only reach orgasm by thinking about the sales rack at a German discount supermarket. “My kinky dreams are quite commonplace,” said Audrey Tindler. “A postman asking if he can step inside until the scary chihuahua stops chasing him. A […]
Confirmed: it always rains in Luxembourg
Despite some recent and obviously false claims, it has always rained non-stop in Luxembourg, and it will always rain non-stop in Luxembourg, it has been confirmed. “Some people – delusional or simply dishonest, it’s hard to say – have publicly stated that for several weeks it did not rain,” said Carlo Reenmann, a realist who […]
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