LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — A steel company employee known to fake illness at least twice a month has been recognized for her tremendous achievements in acting. At its annual awards ceremony on Friday, the Luxembourg Work Actors’ Guild awarded Aurélie Bardol the Best Acting Sick prize, a golden statuette of a man calling in sick while simultaneously […]
Faking sickness in Luxembourg: three easy steps
In some countries, faking sickness requires careful preparation and an acting performance worthy of an Oscar. Not in Luxembourg. Want a few days off just because it’s Tuesday, the weather is bad, or your cat ate all the Nutella again? Follow these three steps: Inform your boss In the morning, send an email saying […]
Meeting plunged into English due to single anglophone
GASPERICH — A department meeting was plunged into total English on Wednesday, causing moderate levels of confusion and leaving at least one person severely annoyed. The monthly gathering — comprising 18 employees from seven different countries — is usually held in French. However, it quickly became apparent that a new anglophone employee was suffering from […]
Officials: seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors ‘imminent’
LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Officials have issued a warning about the seasonal outbreak of men wearing scarves indoors, predicting that this year’s bout will arrive as early as next week. “Don’t be fooled by the mild early autumn weather,” said Myriam Bravini, chief fashion virologist for the Grand Duchy’s Office of Urban Apparel. “The season of men […]
Luxembourgish boss forces entire office to order fish at Schueberfouer dinner
GLACIS — A casual office dinner at the Schueberfouer on Wednesday turned into a display of tyrannical power as the Luxembourgish boss who organized the event compelled all 17 employees present to eat the traditional fried fish. “I’d like the veal cordon bleu,” said receptionist Agnes Molnar, 31, when the waitress arrived at the table. […]