Luxembourg Wurst

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Five traditional jobs that are disappearing from Luxembourg

While it might take several decades for taxi drivers and restaurant servers to be replaced by robots, here are five traditional jobs in Luxembourg that will soon disappear forever.  Potato whisperer  Back when potatoes were believed to be sentient, every village in Luxembourg had a potato whisperer. These folks, usually a bit smelly under the […]

Oops: malfunctioning indexation mechanism gives Luxembourg workers raise of 23,456 percent

LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Saying “whoa, hey, somebody stop that thing,” Luxembourg government officials stood by helplessly as the mechanism that was developed to automate salary indexation malfunctioned, giving everyone a pay increase of 23,456 percent.  The red-faced officials admitted that although the increase was enormous and would likely bankrupt every employer, there was nothing they could […]

Man crawls across Luxembourg City to raise awareness for dangers of after-work drinks

LUXEMBOURG-VILLE — Repeatedly saying “ugh” and cursing at everyone who offered to help him, a man has crawled all the way through the capital as part of a one-man campaign to raise awareness for the dangers of after-work drinks.  “Two-for-one cocktails, oh, uh, not my fault, barman made ‘em strong, too strong,” said Bereldange resident […]

Young colleague who partied non-stop all summer cannot work due to sniffle

A young, healthy colleague who’s known around the office as a 24/7 party boy and who boasted of completing “the world’s most epic non-stop drinking session” this summer has been tragically struck down by a minor sniffle only a week after returning to work.   Chase Goblenz, 27, chronicled on Instagram the summer’s feats, which included […]