Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Wealthy expat discovers existence of local working class

An affluent foreign-born resident of Mamer is being lauded for having discovered a formerly unknown social group which she is calling “a body-using, hand-working underclass.” “One morning, I woke up early and observed some men removing the bins from the side of my house,” says Val Haark, 33, a stay-at-home wife who in her spare […]

This Luxembourg cyclist attached a smoking exhaust pipe to his bike, now drivers smile and call him ‘friend’

Fed up with the hostility he received from car drivers while riding on the streets of Luxembourg City and its environs, a cyclist from Strassen has found an effective but simple way to gain their favor. Architect Carlos Maldonado, 44, jerry-rigged an automobile muffler so that it expels smoke whenever he rides. Now, he says, […]

Supercomputer ‘totally confused’ by plan to house it in Luxembourg

A European supercomputer scheduled to be installed in Luxembourg in 2020 has issued a sharp rebuke to the plan, saying you don’t need to be capable of performing quadrillions of calculations per second to figure out that it’s too expensive here. “I’m totally confused, because these people tell me I’m going to Luxembourg to help […]

Road engineer wins bet he can squeeze another lane into Route d’Arlon

Demonstrating the spirit of Luxembourg’s motto “Let’s make it happen,” a VDL road engineer has won a challenge to fit another traffic lane into the already cramped Route d’Arlon. According to witnesses, Lorenzo Donini, 53, was enjoying a beer with fellow civil engineers last week when they began discussing the often congested artery that connects […]