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Luxembourg Wurst

Knock A Shining Dog

Opinion: it’s time to recruit drug dealers to get the vaccine for us

January 29, 2021

It's time to recruit drug dealers to get the vaccine for us

While it’s easy to criticize the Luxembourg government for the snail-like vaccine rollout, it’s clear that neither Prime Minister Xavier Bettel nor Minister of Health Paulette Lenert are fully responsible. Governments across the EU are grappling with similar shortages. There is simply not enough supply to go around, and we’re now witnessing a massive blame […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Opinion

Rich and influential country can’t even pull a few strings to get vaccine faster

January 19, 2021

Rich Luxembourg can't even get vaccine

A wealthy, influential country whose capital is one of the three seats of power in the European Union is unable to pull a few strings to get its residents vaccinated faster, it has been revealed.  “We’ve got all this money here in Luxembourg,” said one resident who’s been working at home since November and now […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Grand Duchy of Luxembourg, Politics and Government

Great news: gym has slot open next Thursday from 6:15 to 6:45 am

January 15, 2021

Gym Luxembourg Covid

A Luxembourg man has raised his arms and sung hymns of praise after successfully booking an early morning half-hour slot at his fitness center next week. “I heard that my gym was open again, but not from them because apparently they yet haven’t yet mastered the difficult art of website and social media updates,” said […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article, Leisure and Lifestyle

Dudelange hipster making own vaccine 

January 12, 2021

DIY hipster making own vaccine

Describing corporate vaccines as “a dull assemblage of mass-tested mRNA that show no imagination or nuance,” a hipster from Dudelange has announced he is making his own vaccine.  “Big Pharma vaccines are all the same,” said Michel Paracetti, who in the past experimented with brewing his own beer, designing t-shirts with ironic messages, and raising […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Featured Article

British variants in Luxembourg already seeking nationality 

January 7, 2021

British variant COVID strain in Luxembourg

Several individual variants of the so-called UK coronavirus strain that have been identified in Luxembourg in recent days have already taken steps to obtain Luxembourgish nationality, according to the viruses themselves. All of the mutated viruses have already signed up for online Luxembourgish courses, and they’ve also begun seeking advice and tips in expat forums. […]

Filed Under: Coronavirus / COVID-19, Europe, Expats, Featured Article

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The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!

The Idiot of St. Benedict – Order Now!
Prices in Luxembourg City

New shop in center offers usual stuff but at ‘twice the price’ 

Cashier watching you enter PIN

Cashier turns away, attaches blindfold, puts bag over head while you enter PIN

Man thanks LinkedIn

No, please don’t: man thanks people who invite him to connect on LinkedIn

Drug dealer Luxembourgish

Well, it’s a start: Gare dealer offers drugs in Luxembourgish

St. Valentine beheaded

Ghost of beheaded St. Valentine wishes couple a romantic evening

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